Wednesday, May 22, 2019

Be Prepared for an Emergency

Have your MAGA hat on. Make disparaging comments about taxes and regulation among your acquaintances. Let them know where you stand. Insinuate there are hordes of unscrupulous people dying to get on the dole. It suggests you are not one of them.

Be white and Protestant. We know from New Orleans and Puerto Rico that it’s bad to be black or Catholic in a natural disaster or emergency. God help you if you are both. Remember, stay calm as the storm approaches. Afterwards, mutter prayerful, fatalistic nonsense.

Stay white. Stay Protestant. Be a white girl if possible. They will do anything to save your ass if you are a white girl. Follow these rules and inconceivable amounts of free stuff will come your way when disaster strikes. If you are black or brown it’s best to just flee.

Look at what happened in New Orleans. Look at what happened to Puerto Rico.

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