Counteroffer

My counteroffer to Donald Trump and the Republicans on his bid for the presidency is "no." Donald, negotiate that. You are unfit for any role in government whatsoever. 

Go somewhere far away and pretend you are a big man. Buy yourself an island, lest you fall behind your fellow lords of whatever. Every real mogul has to have an island.

You can buy one of those naked statues of yourself that were so popular and put it at the dock or heliport to greet your guests. The image is, unfortunately, unforgettable.