I Want to be a Genius

They say you can't throw a rock in New York City without hitting a Jewish genius or two, but my peeps are associated with drunkenness and volubility. I'm not a drunk and--oh, damn, I may be a bit voluble. I may have to stipulate to that. Anyway, for better or worse, identification is an important part of everything. I'm a confirmed anti-utopian.

According to the principles of which you embrace the weirdness, imperfection, error and inadequacy of your being. And identification, as in "identity movements," can be bad stuff but everything in moderation, that's my motto, and everyone should have groups they identify with that help them to innocently feel good about themselves.

It's a freebie, as long as there's no persecution of other groups. Even exclusion is okay, again in moderation, as long as everyone has a way to belong and be enfranchised and be happy and have a good life. A humane society makes it easy for people to feel good about themselves, through identification and other means.

It helps you own your imperfection. Maybe I need to give up on the genius thing, but it has such a nice ring. I don't go to church. "Episcopalian." No, I don't think so. The Elks and Moose are still out there, aren't they? I'll get me to a lodge. Be a Moose. It amazes and embarrasses me, but I just remembered: that was a nickname I once had, as a child.

"Moose." Oh, man, this hasn't gone off in a good direction. From aspirations of genius to moose.